Clear Pronouns Mean Clear Writing

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Ever crack open a novel or story and find yourself confused about who is doing what?

I try not to be pedantic when working with an author through substantive language edits at the sentence level. Maintaining the author’s voice and style is important, as is maintaining specific vocal cadences and dialects for reader immersion and believability.

Within the ever-changing world of grammar and common usage, I know enough to know I can’t possibly know all the things, so I keep a general humbleness about me, a willingness to be incorrect. But even I have my limits, and I draw a line at ambiguous pronoun-antecedent pairs. Those little buggers, hiding in your story, may make the difference between reader immersion and reader confusion.

Prompted by Fallon Clark via Adobe Firefly

Why pronouns need antecedents for reading comprehension

Many folks in the United States, even readers, struggle with reading comprehension. According to American Public Media, about 130 million American adults have low literacy skills. While there are many reasons for low literacy and reading-comprehension struggles, you can help your future readers by making sure that your story is clear, that your readers know what it happening — and to or because of whom — so they can remain in your story and enjoy it all the way through.

And one simple way to clarify your story for readers is making sure that each pronoun you use clearly links back to an antecedent noun.

  • Pronoun – A word that replaces a previously written or stated noun (e.g., he, she, they, it, that)
  • Antedecent – The noun the replacement pronoun represents (e.g., Bobby, Susan, the students, a table, a tree)

Here are some examples of pronouns in action, along with their corresponding antecedents:

  • Kelsey is here, and she isn’t happy, where “Kelsey” is the antecedent noun, and “she” her pronoun.
  • The maple tree is losing its leaves, where “maple tree” is the antecedent noun and “its” the pronoun.

If pronouns and their antecedents seems straightforward, that’s because it can be. However, when there are multiple antecedent nouns, reading comprehension can become strained.

  • My best friend had a strained relationship with his brother, Shawn, which he talked about in therapy. In this example, the reader may be unsure whether “my best friend” or “Shawn” talked about the strained relationship in therapy because the pronoun “he” could speak to either person.
  • The yellow group and the purple group differed in that they preferred quiet time. In this example, the reader may not know whether the yellow group or the purple group preferred quiet time since “they” can be assigned to either.

So, how can you locate antecedent-pronoun pairs that may cause reader confusion?

How to find unclear antecedents and pronouns in your writing

Finding the unclear antecedent-pronoun pairs in your story isn’t as straightforward as using CTRL+F to find all instances of he, she, they, or it; the process of finding unclear antecedent-pronoun pairs, though, once you become comfortable with it, will show you immediate ways to clarify and uplevel your writing. And there are many words used as pronouns in writing that may slip under the proverbial radar if you’re not careful.

There are several types of pronouns, from personal pronouns (subject, object, and possessives), demonstrative pronouns, interrogative pronouns, relative pronouns, indefinite pronouns, relative pronouns, reflexive pronouns, and intensive pronouns. Here’s a list:

Personal pronouns:

  • Subject pronouns (I, you, he, she, it, we, you, they)
  • Object pronouns (me, you, him, her, it, us, you, them)
  • Possessive pronouns (mine, yours, his, hers, its, ours, yours, theirs)

Demonstrative pronouns (this, these, that, those)

Interrogative pronouns (who, whom, which, what)

Relative pronouns (who, whom, that, which, whoever, whichever, whomever)

Indefinite pronouns (all, another, any, anybody, anyone, anything, each, everybody, everyone, everything, few, many, nobody, none, one, several, some, somebody, and someone)

Reflexive pronouns (myself, yourself, himself, herself, ourselves, yourselves, themselves)

Intensive pronouns (myself, yourself, himself, herself, ourselves, yourselves, themselves)

Some of the pronoun antecedents will be clear right away. Readers will connect the “I” to the pronouns “my” and “myself” pretty quickly. But when your story contains multiple characters or items sharing pronouns, readers will need a clear connection to assign the pronoun to the correct antecedent noun.

When revising your story, look for examples of pronouns in your story and rewrite the sentences, if necessary, to make sure the corresponding pronoun is clear.

Re-writing sentences for pronoun-antecedent clarity

When revising your story, elevate reading comprehension by rewriting any sentence with an unclear pronoun-antecedent pair. Before, I provided these two examples:

  • My best friend had a strained relationship with his brother, Shawn, which he talked about in therapy.
  • The yellow group and the purple group differed in that they preferred quiet time.

Let’s rewrite these sentences for clarity:

  • My best friend talked about his strained relationship with his brother, Shawn, in therapy. Now, readers will know that “My best friend talked about the relationship in therapy. “Shawn” is the object of the conversation.
  • The yellow group preferred quiet time, which differed from the purple group.

Often, a pronoun’s antecedent noun is in the same sentence, like in the previous examples. Sometimes, though, the antecedent noun is located a bit earlier in the paragraph, which makes discovery a slow-and-steady process.

  • Samantha picked up the discarded notebook. Townspeople were all around the meeting room, some standing and pointing, shouting, and the air was thick and warm. The chime dinged to call order, and the board president straightened his tie. Still, Samantha wanted order, and it made the floor look messy.

In this example, by the time the reader gets to the “it” pronoun, there are many antecedent nouns to which “it” may be attributed: the meeting room, the air, the chime, the president’s tie. All of these possibilities may trip up the reader, who may forget about that discarded notebook. To close the possible confusion gap, put the antecedent noun a bit closer to the pronoun:

  • Townspeople were all around the meeting room, some standing and pointing, shouting, and the air was thick and warm. The chime dinged to call order, and the board president straightened his tie. Samantha picked up the discarded notebook. It made the floor look messy.

TL;DR: Pronoun-antecedent pairs wrap-up

Readers are more likely to understand your pronouns when the pronouns are close to the words they represent. When revising your story for clarity, look at your pronouns, where they are in relation to their antecedent nouns, and whether there are any mischievous extra nouns worming their ways into your sentences and paragraphs, and rewrite to reduce reader confusion.

Happy writing.

<3 Fal

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Fallon Clark is the book pal who helps you tell your story in your words and voice using editorial, coaching, writing, and project management expertise for revision assistance, one-on-one guidance, and ghostwriting for development. Her writing has been published in Flash Fiction Magazine. Check out her website, FallonClark.com, or connect with her on LinkedIn or Substack.

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